When you want to give up , ask yourself why you hold on for so long .

Because i love him .

28DECEMBER2010 ,

HAPPY NINE MONTHS (L)

yesterday was awesome , went out with Mike .

Went many places took many photos with his new Sony DSLR (L) .

It was so fun ! :D

Though the weather was kinda shity but there were time where the rain stops and we could take pretty photos .

It was like a usual date went to some shopping mall i nvr before to find his liverpool jersey all those . hahas .

Then went for Seoul Garden lunch @ Taka .

Then walked around the place where got pretty buildings (L)

& took many random photos :D

YAY I SO HAPPY (^.^)

Time really flies , 5 months ago we went there too .

Hmm and now we've alrd been through so much .

I really hope we can both jiayou tgt for next year dearest .

:D

TOMORROW (L)

Gen , here is a post for you .

Do you remember how we used to laugh our ass off .

And how Shirleen always smile no matter how tired are the drills or practices .

Thats when i'm really happy .

But when i'm sad , i really don't know how to smile nt even talk .

So ya nt asking you do that .

Just telling you , cry all you want .

Laugh all you want .

Just don't act happy when you're nt .

Cause you're just nt la . LOL

idk how to say , but want to be happy be real happy .

:D

Anw while shirleen is happy , then she'll try to make you happy.

If nt she herself , forget how to be happy.

HEHE.

Boo ! Today is awesome . Though its band day . It's awesome . Cause i missed band for so long , missed out so much . Sessionals is fun i like . hehe .Hmm , then actually wanted fine Mike but nvr lo . hehe .Hmm tmr is the dayyyy ! :D Gonna go find him then ltr go watch moviesssss ba . HEHE .Happy happy ~

And today Huijing & Gen thanks for waiting for me . Cause as usual i'm late . HEHE.

Ahhh , god thanks for everything .

Don't play with me again horrrr :'(

Hmmm , everything is now fine and i suppose i'm fine too .

The year gonna end which also means school gonna reopen , people enjoy the last week okay ~

And school gonna be stresssss , ohya next time is mon , thurs ,fri &SAT BANDDD ?!!! nvm . jiayouss .

♥

You're my everything .

28 is 2 days away ! (L)

Yesterday talked to Sean and Justin and realise maybe i should really just trust and not think so much since i really love him so much . Just go all the way again NO REGRETS JUST LOVE. And finally i can sleep properly again ! HEHE . 2 more days i cnt waitttt . Ohya for the 15 years of my life i've nvr believe in Santa , you know what i wish for this year ? Michael Bernardine .

Michael Bernardine , you make me insanely happy again .

Thankyou alot alot ,

Iloveyou beyond description .

28DEC, is in 3 days time .

A very important day for me , i hope for us (:

Jurong Bird Park here WE come !

(:

I hope nothing goes wrong this time .

Because school is reopening soon &

block test are all coming to block my brain . LOL :/

Dear , let me believe in us again .

Because i always do .

Even when i was so tired to try anymore , you gave me hope .

& i've never thought of giving up .

I love you ,

i finally understand how much this three words meant to me .

I've being saying it for months .

And i realized you're already a part of my life .

A part of me .

I believe you .

For a moment it's fine and its nt and it is.

I'm rather confuse .

I'm scared .

Very scared .

It's Christmas , and i feel so stress .

Everything seems like a dream , i don't know when the nightmare is going to end .

I don't know , maybe it ended maybe it didn't .

Guys sorry for nt replying msges and i still won't .

My heart is nt make of stone or rocks , even stone or rocks erode and fall apart after a period of time .

I'm tired of being scared and everything .

And i really want to believe again .

Have faith again .

Shirleen Tan please .Stop .

because i can have faith and believe but if i do that i will put in everything again .

And idk what will fucking happen again .

Ah fuck it .

Okay i shall believe again for that i still fucking love you alot alot ./

Yay :D

See this smile , the day everything is fine.

Shirleen Tan smiles .

The day something goes wrong , her smile will be lost :P

Hhehehe , merry christmas people .

hope you all enjoy ba :D

After A WEEK , finally it's really really okay .

God , i think i should believe there is one .

No matter what god , there is one .

Cause i prayed , to god any god . And everything became fine .

Yea , and heart is such a funny thing , it can be functioning well , but when you can yet feel it scattering apart.

Sometimes people come and go in your life.

No is always , is just the matter if you want to let them go .

If you really want , you can just hag care everything and be happy .

But did you felt that way before, when you're sick like a dog but you really need to go and get someone back that is so important to your life , you know you can choose to let go , you also can choose to be brave and go for it , no matter what is the result you just want to try .

Yea , i always felt that way .

1 year plus ago , i lost someone i love , i wanted to go for him . But i didn't dare i wasn't brave .

Now , i'm nt gonna do the same thing cause i love mike so much , you might think i'm just another young teenage girl too obsess with her boyf . Ya i am , but it's nt wrong right . All i want is to love him , it's not a crime (:

And i'm glad i'm a much more brave girl now, and with him i'm happy.

You can think ya , next time he might be gone and i'm off with another guy .

I'm never this kind of girl , i never leave unless he doesn't love me anymore .

I'm shirleen tan , i've learn from my 15 years of life .

No matter what just go for what you want , consequences comes and face it .

But know limits .

Ya , and he made me alot more brave and everything thats why ..

Hmm , this post is like how i feel .

You don't have to read it readers .

And yea Christmas is coming .

People , feel the chimes ! :D

I love you and i miss you beyond description (:

See this ? i'm okay le . The post he see or see no diff ba .I guess when someone fever is really high , mind gets off . Now i'm perfectly fine . Cause see this . He just keeps me go on , i will recover soon . And you'll see the Shirleen that is hyper than anyone else soon . Band peeps i'm so going to go the exchange , i somehow miss going band suffering and waiting for time to end , it's much more better than staying home emo-ing . Boo . HEHE .People , shirleen is happy again wait for her to recover and BOO ! on your face :P i mean at . hehe.

i won't ask you read ba . (:

forget it , you don't know .

Always my dearest .

Michael Bernardine, i doubt you so free come my blog. hehe.

But idc i'll ask you read , hehehe :/

Finally , you're fine already .

From Thursday to today morning everything was nightmare .

Idk what happened , seriously .

Thursday you got so pissed , i left crying , Fri morning you were fine after you got your results everything start to turn badddddd :'(

I spammed you with so many sms , thinking if i made you piss or sth , and crying :/

But when you finally replied you only ask if i'm okay then you said bye then i cried again .

Then suddenly .

Boom . I receive a message that i don't know how to respond and make my fever went up again . Crap manz , and it was frankly i was so scared . Very very .

I didn't wanted you to leave , but didn't wanted to make you piss .
I even wanted to start talking crap like racking up the past but i know i shouldn't you'll be sad and pissed and everything so i tahannnnn and idk what i was sms-ing you alrd , but at night the long long msg i sent you is all true everything i got more to type though but it'll become a book . LOL . so i just summarize . Hhehe.

Well , then today morning i was crying though i told myself not to then i msged you wanting to make some arrangement then you somehow got your mind okay again .

& then you're back to me .

Let me tell you what i wanted to do okay . Hehe , i wanted to find you . Hug you really tight and tell you all sorts of everything until you want me again . But YAY . You're mine again . Hehez .

At first , i thought i was dreaming so i slapped myself and its nt , cause i slap really hard and it hurts , but i was like jumping on my bed crying in tears of joy , and end up banging on the wall . LOL :/

I'm scared you know , just imagine if you were me , you will cry and be okay and cry again and stay awake the whole night writing some craps then not falling asleep then when i fell asleep i woke up .

But we'll be fine right , back like always .

Happily together , working hard for O level :D

I love you no matter what .

Don't think of leaving me again pleaseeeee .
Cause it gives me "heartattack" .

Stress tell me lah , erm though i'm normally very stupid i'll just make you more stress :/ Hehe . But just remember i'm always here for you no matter what . But idk how make people happy :'(

But i'm here always (L)
i know friends come first , but rmb when they are nt there , look beside you i'll be always there . Hehehehe .

AND i want kill the maple mushrooms la , they snatching you from meeeee ! ):

Boooo , joking lah . Hehehehehe .

I really love you alot alot alot .

And this post is dedicated for you MICHAEL BERNARDINEEEEEE :D

The guy i never want to let go .

The guy i want to stick with ( you ask me dun always stick to you , i try hor .Hehe )

& all the promises i've made , i will keep it.

And i want to marry you someday .

We're young , but our love is strong and true righttttt ?

Hmmmm , okay shall stop here .

& don't say byebye to me again so scary .

Next time say ttyl okay . LOL :/
and now i miss you like alot alot alot . really .

Boo , you scare me .

You make me cry for days .

Ha , you owe me big time .

See the weather now , thats how i feel .

:'(

what is happening ):

I feel horrible .

I don't want to be sick alrd :'(

You're getting your results today /.

All the best .

*cross finger , or close my eyes to pray*

Michael Bernardine Please go 5N .

Please . Please .

Yesterday went Suntec caught Tron Legacy super nice .

After that wanted to watch Hello strangers but left single seats :/

And after that ... nvm .. it's ok le :D

2HOURS PLUS MORE.

I REALLY HOPE YOU CAN GET TO 5N .

I LOVE YOU .

Hey baby , i think i wanna marry you .

i wanna watch ep 10 of GLEE , my operator sot sot one cannot place the files tgt . Hmm , i wanna get hardisk from Mikey . Lols . Hmmmmmm , i kinda miss Mike alot today , though i just saw him yesterday . I think i'm mad . But nvm . lols . Hmm , N lvl results are coming out real soon . ALL THE BEST DEARRRR (L) . There's hell tmr , hmm i guess i'll see Mike after that :D

I'll cross finger and pray hard that Mike goes 5N .

Pure fun :D

WOW WOW WET !

with Audrea , Yunyue , Guohui & Zihan :D

Hey readers , today attended hell . LOL . Then after that went Wild wild wet again .

Reached @ 2.10 , went to change then waited like an idiot for them in the Wild wild wet till 2.30 .lols .Had fun alot manz , went many many rounds at the "Lazy river " . And took damn long to convince YY to take slides like Wu lala , and those other slides with us , and today was the first time i took the children slides .Damn fun . LOL . Then @ the Tsunami there Zihan pushed me all the way to the 1.8M there omg la . Then i was stuck there . As you know , i cnt swim :/ HAHAHA . Then we went to took Wu lala many times because we wanted to take a nice nice photo , but always there is someone that look unglam :/ Hmm then we played till like 6.30? Then we go bath , then Audrea Daddy fetch us home . hehe. Then got home , crap la . Nvm forget itttt . hehe.

Gonna stop here , tag me people , my tagboard dying ):

I feel that i'm having fever :(

Lols , maybe cause i went to Nex AGAIN .

So many people there omg :(

Hmm , hell is starting tmr :/

After that going wild wild wet with ZiHan , GuoHui , Audrea & Yunyue ..

Hmm okay byebye

Cause it's a beautiful night,
We're looking for something dumb to do.
Hey baby ,

I THINK I WANNA MARRY YOU.

Hey readers , today is so boring . I feel like finding Mike .
But i'm going out with my mum to Nex ltr :<
Hell man , go there and suffocate ):
Lols , haiiii . N lvl results is on the 17th .
All the best for you Dear .
Please go 5N .
But no matter what i'll be with you .

I love you (L)

DINOSAURS <3

AWESOME FRIES .

Hi readers, you know what today is awesome :D

Went for the "Walking with Dinosuars " show , and was late cause of the damn entrance :<

At first got some random women ask our taxi driver , how to get to the walking with stadium show?!!! HAHA.

Hmm , but still enjoyed the show , the dinosuars are big and cool .

See facebook for more . hehe .

After the show walked around , and ate dinner and took many photos. hehe .

I love today manz , hehe .

N lvl results coming out soon ): I really hope he go 5N :D

Hello readers , me went to school today then went out . Somewhere :P

Went to watch Narnia , oh well it's gonna be the first and last time i'm watching 3D movie :<

Damn retard , forget it . lols . And the movie is OMG boringgggg . lols .

And poor Mikey broke his Iphone screen ):

Hmm , gonna go see Dinosuarsssss tmrrrrr :P

Dear Yunyue , you're very emo .

Very , i once understand your emo-ness .

Which is kinda long ago .

You'll be fine really , well even if you don't believe me .

But you will be . Really .

One fine day you will be okay seriously .

Hmmm , you're feeling empty .

As a friend , i cnt do much .

But you're my sweetheart , its sad to see you like that .

I'm always here , really .

I hope you will be the sweetheart that is once so happy & always smiling really smiling .

Gal , i love you . :D

FUNNNNN

The Charcoal that cheated our feelings ):

All time favorite , mash mellow :D

The most epic breakfast .

The one on the most right = 11 years of friendship .

The one at the middle = 9 years of friendship .

Wet Wet wow

Force to watch , but turns out to be nice ! :D

2nd day , finally . Nvr cheat us .

Hey readers , time to blog about chalet . It's very fun . Hmm first day we went there and check in . This year damn blur , the BBQ net also forget bring . lols . Then still got many things also never . LOLs .Then at night , set up fire with kai li , i mean the BBQ fire . haha . Then we used more then 40 firestarter at first . Ji fail lo . We thought our fault sia , end up is the charcoal is lousy one. HAHAHA . Then we took some from the one beside us . The students damn kind . haha .But they use zipo light up the fire sia , will dieeee . lols . Then after eat eat eat . We were in the room playing games , watching tv , falling aleep .lolz. Then after many left , at 11.40++ , we went to the Cinema ! :D HEHEHE, we wore like we going there sleep . lols . then i wanted to watch Narnia , but the website ,is either we blind or it cheated our feelings . lols . Then we watched the super long hair girl show.haha .Damn nice sia , eh Shirleen say cartoon is nice damn rare okay . bleah . Then we went back at around 1plus am . hehe . Then we went back , then erm sleep ? No i played Iphone . hehe .~

2nd day was fine . Kai Ning friends came damn early , it was like wow . Nvm . Then she went , we continue sleep first . Then we went ate breakfast with Kail li & her bro . Wa thats the most blur meeeee man . aiyo . Dont' want tell you what . bleah . But i ended up eating the thingi hate the most ): Hmm , then after that we went walked around , many shops nt open , then we went arcade , then i kinda felt cheated nvm . lols .Then later we went Wildwildwet @2.10pm , then we left at 3 plus. .Wow , first time play awhile nia . But it was kinda boring there . haha . The other peeps came back like the past us , sun burn . hahas . I kinda miss last time . More friends were there , apparently , you won't feel like leaving there . hahas .. Then , erm we went back sleep awhile , well i nvr really .lols then we went buy some BBQ food . Thennnnn we went back and set up fire , yay this time is great . haha . Then later Leean came , omg he sot sot la . hahas . Hmm , then skip the rest , then we went bowl @ Ehub at 10 plus till 11 plus , then go back gt some Korean show . lols . I know all the songs . hehe .Then actually wanted to play card games but idk why seems boring , then i played iphone games . lols . Then i slept late , idk what time . Lols !

Then today , checked outttt leeee ): Sad right . hhahaha .Went BK for breakfast , ji nice . hehe . Then both of them were too tired fall alseep in cab . hahaha . ok thats all . I don't think you bother reading but idc la :P

It's all about us .

Hello people , i'm back from 3 days , two nights Chalet . hehe . It's fun & cool . Photos will be up later , well simply because i doesn't have the photos . lols . Hmm , so well . I'll blog about the Chalet later . hehe .

I wanna blog about me & Mikey .

We've been together for 528 days i think . hehe Okay well , this is a random post lah . hahas . But don't mind me i just feel like blogging about him out of a sudden . lols . Hmm , he gonna get his N lvl results soon because time flies . I really hope he can get to 5N (: Then we'll work hard together for Olvl okays . Hhehe .Hmm , let me talk about what we did for this holiday erm i try to remember . hahas . Hmm , wait before that i just realise he kinda get angry with me ever since i think October , each month will angry once ;x hehe . Hmm , but it always turns out to be fine . But i always get too paranoid . hehe . We've gone to movies as usual , meeting just to see each other . lols . Met for lunch . and all craps . But overall the Zoo Trip is the most fun one :D Hmm , i think i could write everything about me & him into a book and give it to him on our 1 year , but i doubt he would read it , and we're nt even 9 months yet , but it's not too early to think of what to do . Because always remember time flies :P Okay , it's gettting abit long . hahas . Wait for my next post about Chalet Okay . hehe . This post is just random . lols . i love Michael Bernardine ALOT :D

We'll have piglet , dog & bunny in the future <3

Rainbow after rain

Yesterday i screwed up .
But okay it's now okay le :D
Played WII !!!
As usual suck at Mario Kart ):
But Bowlinggggg was fun .hehe .
Then played the guitar hero -like game . FUN !!! (L)
Hmmm went Nex , it was omg .
Make people have headache okay ):
So many ppl , i think need traffic light lo . LOL .
hmmmm , tmr going chalet le :D
Don't jealous hor people .
Hmm , i'll blog when i'm back or something i guess . hehe .

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMYYYYY !!!

I love you okay .

Though i always make you angry . balhblahblah .

haha . Hope you like the present . hehehehe :D

With Loves ,

HUIJING :

Dear Hujing , Happy birthday !

Okay , this is the 3rd time saying . LOL .

Hmm , enjoy your day , and i hope every other single day you can and will be happy .

We all want to see the Huijing that can smile really really happily .

We all miss her so much .

Seeing a good friend sad , you will feel sad too ):

Hujing , be happy .

The next one would be better , really .

We all know , you have being hurt so many times before . But believe in good :D

HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY GAL .

LOVE YOU SO MUCH (L)

SWEETHEART :

Dear Yunyue , you're sad .

But glad that you're kinda slowly moving moving on .

idk , but i hope you will be fine .

You can find someone better , believe me .

You've gt your friends here . :D

Just forget him and move on okay ;x

I know it's easy to say , but hard to do it ):

Hmmm , friends are here to help to pull through this .

Sweetheart , i love you alot okay .

Bu yao sad , if nt i will also feel sad cause ni sad ):

I LOVE YOU alot alot ! :D
(idk what colour you like so put alot of colours. LOL)

GEN :

Dear gen . haha .

Have been talking to you lately , hmm .

I hope you're fine . haha

Because you got awesome friends like meeee . hahah . bhb ;x

Hmm , i love you alot too okay .

And you owe meeeee a blogggie post :P

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/Shirln

Today is awesome , had D&t .
At first damn shag , cause from yesterday idk why . SHAG like hell ):
hmm , then spent lots of time sewing the damn button and the thing ;x
Then later finally done with one pathetic button after afew hrs ;/
Hmm , then the teachers treated us PIZZA !!! :D
Then after that walked home with Audrea . hehe .
Hmm mummy's bdate is coming .
I want make cake , who can teach me . hahahaha
I want make the 5 minutes or 3 minutes mug cake . haha ;x
But i scared i ruin it .
I guess i will try ba . haha .

People enjoy your holiday before hell starts ^^